Even cold-blooded killers need a creative outlet. But in at least one of the following cases if the murderer who wrote about his own crimes had just taken up basket weaving or ukulele instead of creative writing he might have been a free man to this day.
They say that everyone’s got a novel in them. But if you’ve committed shocking acts of violence, it’s probably better to keep that novel shoved down deeper than the bodies are buried.
If critics can be vicious, then these hacks are deadly.
The Most Pretentious Murderer Who Wrote About His Own Crimes: Krystian Bala
Dumb Catholic cops persecute iconoclastic young Polish author, just because they can’t tell fiction from reality.
At least, this is the story that cold-blooded creep Krystian Bala put out to world media when he was arrested in 2005, for the cold-case killing of a young businessman some five years before.
But pretentious ex-pat Pole, Bala, was playing yet another po-mo game at the expense of the po-po.
The truth turned out to be far simpler than fiction. Like many jealous losers before him, Bala had become enraged when he saw his ex-wife out dancing with printer Dariusz Janiszewski.
In the dying days of December 2000, the one-time philosophy department whizkid turned bankrupt businessman hatched a scheme to kidnap the blameless Janiszewski. Bala brutally tortured his victim, before dumping Janiszewski’s still-bound body in a river.
The case stymied police for several years, during which time murderer Bala left Poland.
Murder Squad Summer Reading List
While in self-imposed exile, the self-proclaimed Nietzschen superman taught scuba diving, English as a second language and started work on a novel.
Perhaps stuck for ideas, the plot of the novel outlined a killing eerily similar to Bala’s real-life torture-slaying of Janiszewski.
In 2003 Bala got his novel published, under the title Amok.
But in 2005 supercop Chief Inspector Jack Wroblewski received an anonymous call. The caller told him to pick up a copy of Amok. People don’t call the police tips line just to give literary recs, so soon Wroblewski had organised a little murder squad book club. The once cold case started to hot up.
Thanks to detailed detective work, Wroblewski could link Bala to the murder via sale of a mobile phone he had taken from his victim. Bala was convicted of Janiszewski’s murder in 2007. He appealed the following year, but the court upheld the ‘guilty’ verdict.
Bala is reportedly working on his second novel behind bars.
The Most Successful Murderer Who Wrote About His Own Crimes: Liu Yongbiao
This successful Chinese author bludgeoned to death four people in a in robbery in 1995.
Unlike your worst-ever philosophy major boyfriend Krystian Bala, Liu Yongbiao’s crimes weren’t traced to him directly via his terrible writing.
It was DNA not ABCs that stuck this Chinese crime writer in the chokey.
But Liu Yongbiao’s crimes were especially brutal and the delay in solving the case left plenty of time for this criminal to hone his literary craft.
In November 1995 Lui and an accomplice murdered a guest in a Zhejiang province hostel when a robbery went wrong. To cover up the crime, the young magazine writer and his fellow criminal, coldly beat to the death the family who owned the guesthouse, not even sparing their fourteen-year-old grandson.
His first novel published in 2005 was a slushy romance. But his next novel, A Guilty Secret, hit closer to home. At the time of his arrest he was already working on a follow-up. The Beautiful Writer Who Killed was to be about a lady author who evades capture for her horrible killings.
But life only imitates art up to a point.
In 2018, the 54-year-old author, was sentenced to death for his part in the November 1995 slayings.
The Vile Domestic Abuser Murderer Who Wrote About His Own Crimes: Richard Klinkhammer
In 1991 shitty Richard Klinkhammer killed his wife Hannelore.
Hannelore’s early life had been marred by tragedy. When she was just nine years old her mother was murdered by her father. Hannelore was the one to find her mother’s bludgeoned corpse.
Sadly, like many children who grow up as witnesses to domestic abuse, as an adult she found herself locked into an abusive relationship of her own.
Richard Klinkhammer was a former legionnaire of the French Foreign Legion. He was ten years Hannelore’s senior, a hard drinking, sometime-writer, who’d endured his own difficult upbringing.
Hannelore was quickly smitten, but Richard soon became abusive. When Hannelore disappeared in winter 1991, suspicion swiftly fell upon the volatile Richard.
But he denied all involvement and since Hannelore’s body remained missing, the investigation lapsed.
Then only a year after he killed his wife, the shameless Klinkhammer pitched a project that even his supportive publisher was too squeamish to green light.
The now-notorious manuscript was titled Woensdag Gehaktdag, or ‘Wednesday Mince Day’. It laid out in gory detail seven ways that cowardly wife-beater Klinkhammer could have disposed of Hannelore’s corpse.
The publisher turned it down.
Police Made A Right Hash Of Things
Klinkhammer sold up, moved to Amsterdam, found a new girlfriend and enjoyed a certain cult success on the Dutch crime-fiction scene.
Then in 1997 couple who unaware of its gory secret had purchased the Klinkhammer murder house, decided to do some home renovations.
They hired a crew to dig up the concrete floor the garden shed.
Encased in the concrete was the battered body of Hannelore.
The court sentenced Richard Klinkhammer to seven years for manslaughter and concealing a body. He was out in two.
Even before Klinkhammer started his blink-and-you-miss-it stint in the clink, his scumbag publisher reached out via lawyer to try to get his mitts on the grisly mince book.
Back when he thought it was fiction, the manuscript left a bad taste in his mouth. But it became hot-stuff when he realized it was all too true. Clearly smell of money made ‘mince day’ much more palatable.
Woensdag Gehaktdag was published in 2007. Its unrepentant author died in 2016, at the ripe old age of 78.
Serial Killer Murderer Who Wrote About His Own Crimes While Working As A Journo: Jack Unterweger
Touching tale of redemption turned to stomach churning horror, when sicko journo Jack Unterweger got let out of lock up.
Born to a Viennese barmaid, Unterweger never knew his father. With his mother in prison, his maternal grandfather raised him. Unterweger has claimed that he endured an abusive childhood at the hands of his grandfather. However, others in the family dispute this.
Whatever the truth, young Jack started his career of murderous mayhem early.
He strangled teenage Margaret Schäfer to death with her own bra, when he was just 24-years-old. But by this point Unterweger had already wracked up a string of sexual assault charges and spent much of his teen years in and out of jail.
Hit with a life sentence for the slaying of 18-year-old Margaret, Unterweger set out to prove what a very sweet and tender hooligan underneath it all. He churned out poems, stories, plays and even an autobiography. Eventually these penitent outpourings met their mark.
Soon die Sahne der la Sahne of German-language glittering literati were clamoring to give this violent sex offender with the gilded pen another shot at life on the outside.
In 1985 a campaign to pardon Unterweger failed. Authorities released five years later after he had served his fifteen-year minimum.
But He Was Fine Now, Right?
The same year he was released, Jack Unterweger murdered eight women.
He carried out these vile crimes in exactly the same manner that he had killed his first victim. Unterweger might have workshopped his writing inside, but clearly he felt that when it came to murder he’d nailed it on the first draft.
Meanwhile, his autobiographical account of his rehabilitation was being taught in schools and his tales for tots were being broadcast on the radio.
But pen-wielding sex-killer Unterweger wasn’t content with just murdering women. He also got a thrill from covering his own crimes.
To do this wormed his way into a reporter’s role and filed stories on the women he’d killed.
He even took his killing spree trans-Atlantic. In 1993 he was sent to America by an Austrian magazine to report on the LA crime beat. On this week-long trip Unterweger interviewed law enforcement, went on a ride along with cops and murdered three women.
And just in case this story wasn’t sick and sordid enough… you can add Unterweger’s name to the guestbook of the infamous Cecil Hotel. Allegedly this is where Unterweger stayed in LA on the magazine’s expense account.
Ultimately Unterweger’s crimes caught up with him. In 1994 was tried on nine counts of murder, convicted and sentenced to life for a second time. Rather than trying his hand at composing rock operas this time round, cowardly Unterweger committed suicide in his cell.